Recently, I supported friends through the heartbreak of goodbye. They had imagined a full life together, and now this vision was being swiftly revoked, before their youngest would even start kindergarten. I visited and together we worked on drafting legacy letters. One of this friend’s deepest fears was his children not remembering him. As his… Continue reading Finding What Resonates: Trial and Error in Doula Work
As doulas, we enter into our clients’ end-of-life and grief journeys as our(whole)selves. This includes not only kindness and patience, but also our conditioning and triggers as well. We are not empty vessels. We carry hushed reminders of past trauma, festering wounds, and unrecognized assumptions. We are not void of dynamic humanness—thankfully so. In truth,… Continue reading Whole Selves and Shadow Sides: A Balanced Doula
In memory of Nancy Hays Gurney, Jan 4, 1956 – May 3, 2005 15 years. Fifteen years since the world has seen your smirk . . . since I’ve felt your hug squeeze the breath out of me, your soft raspberry bathrobe against my cheek . . . since I’ve heard you say both my… Continue reading On Knowing Enough
Across the globe, the majority of us have two jobs: Hold gratitude for those on the frontlines providing direct care to people suffering from COVID-19.Follow any and all safety guidelines to enable essential workers to do their essential work. It’s vital that we stay home and stay calm. Even though that might sound simple, it… Continue reading Tending Life in a Pandemic: An Antidote to Anxiety
Compassion is a practice. It’ll never be a perfect practice. Intention is key. Introspection is paramount. And, self-care is vital.